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Christmas, Carol

by Black Camaro

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1.
Cold wind feels like its blowin from the north of course, I’m forced to turn my back to it standin frozen like a statue is People in the parking lot ooh ooh people in the drive through they're done being nice to you Any More Lately my eyes are pointed to the ground I don't think I’ve ever felt this rotten or even worse, forgotten People in the parking lot ooh ooh people in the drive through they wont be so nice to you People in the parking lot other people in the drive through they've never been nice to you They got no patience kickin down the door automatically people disappearing in the static on their Panasonic TVs People in the parking lot People in the drive -thru people at the cash reg people standin on the edge people at the bus stop all those people at the gunshop
2.
Check out all the brand new merchandise Take it home if you can pay the price (and i can) I want more and more I want more and more Liquid crystal diode picture screens I’ve never seen a more realistic green (and that's sad) I couldn't tell you why i need it, mama Don’t really know what its for but i want more and more I couldn't tell you why i need it, mama Don’t really know what its for but i want more and more I just bought 2 hundred dollar headphones Purchased 2 just in case the first pairs blown I couldn't tell you why i need it mama Don't really know what its for but i want more and more
3.
Row that big ol boat, Noah Row that big ol boat. Row that big ol boat down to Bethlehem Rolling up to Bethlehem two by two got three wise men they’s a following you They said, “Oh! My God!” got alligators, zebra, hippopotamus too more cockatoos around than the Palestine zoo I said, “Oh! My Lord!” Row that big ol boat, Noah Row that big ol boat. Row that big ol boat down to Bethlehem Oak, Cedar, Douglass pine no fiberglass in this carriage of mine You said, “Oh! Hell no!” Shem & Hamm came and Japhet’s friend brought a bottle of booze He brought frankincense, and myrrh and gold The baby’s only 1 day old But soon he’ll be a man and turn into a lamb he’ll come from Bethlehem with holes in his hands Row that big ol boat, Noah Row that big ol boat. Row that big ol boat down to Bethlehem Row that big ol boat, Noah Row that big ol boat. Row that big ol boat down to Bethlehem Sermon on the mount was nice Serve it in my mouth with ice ooh, it was so good I tried it twice Methuselah a thousand years old today Row that big ol boat, Noah Row that big ol boat. Row that big ol boat down to Bethlehem Row that big ol boat, Noah Row that big ol boat. Row that big ol boat down to Bethlehem
4.
Carol says shes so tired of watching the world fall apart no she don't trust mankind to fix it all (or fix it a la carte) world peace, goodwill and cheer is much better than fear induced by profiteers with their body bags and we cheer them on with our little flags and it kills her that everything’s so bleak the weather is a deadbeat dad but in another week It’s gonna be Christmas, Carol, and you can quit trippin bout the world. Carols stares at the calendar, she says damn I’m getting older but its not something to ponder while the cocoas getting colder and it breaks her, that everything’s so gray but its alright, but it's alright Its gonna be Christmas, Carol and you can quit trippin bout the world Carol held up a Christmas light, she said “Check out my cocoon, If I ever break this plastic shell I’d fly up to the moon.” and it thrills her, soon she’ll be asleep and when she wakes tomorrow Its gonna be Christmas, Carol, and you can quit trippin bout the world. Its gonna be Christmas, Carol, and you can quit trippin bout the world. Its gonna be Christmas, Carol, and you can quit trippin bout the world. Its gonna be Christmas, Carol, and you can quit trippin bout the world.
5.
With all the humans on this planet we’re still lonely but we’re only fooled by our own retooling of the universe, traversed by… Autonomated solar powered space ships with pursed and puckered lips, we hand out praise like consolation gifts without consideration for the merit of its recipients Straight through the atmosphere you’ll leave it all behind Where written laws are lies and kitten claws are knives and lives are avatars in online fights Will all this ritualistic celebration come along? the pageant at the Winter Ball and what will they do with all those xmas songs? I don’t want to give the wrong impression but you mind if I ask just one more question Will Santa Clause colonize the planet Mars? or will he keep his promise to this land of ours? Will Santa Clause colonize the planet Mars? Or will he get lost among the stars? All the children on the voyage they are wondering if they’ll still get toys if they’re good girls and boys or do we fill their stockings with the coal for fuels from fossils up and down goes the ticker tape and we speculatin’ of an economic situational comedy accommodation from your mom and me takin’ meetings without reason 'tis the greetings of the season Ebeneezer sneezin on the Ghost of Christmas Past He’s lifting off for the Northern Lights and drifting past the reindeer flights but it’s alright
6.
The make, the model, the year, that you were born, is marked upon, the sacred stone Across the empty landscape lines and through the Valley of the Dead Parked my car between the yucca spines and stuck them in my head I used to love the seashells and held them to my ear but I won’t be home for X-Mas this year
7.
She’s delightful and so fair when the snowflake hits her hair In The Parking Lot of a shopping mall I will dub thee Queen of the winter Ball Queen of the Winter Ball Queen of the Winter Ball
8.
Defroster 02:56
Its so cold and the bleakness baby is chasing down your soul Like a police helicopter looking round like a window shopper But they can’t see in. (huh) No one can. Not me, not the man. But I really really want her, Time to turn on the defroster, baby If you really really want her, you gotta turn on the Defroster Its the coldest its ever been feels like the ice age, aww, once again and I aint talking temperature I’m talking bout temperament and its sacrilege that she sacrifice Block me out like a block of ice Lord knows i still want her time to break out the defroster baby Defroster If you really really want her, you gotta turn on the Defroster she just sit there eyes all fogged up staring at the fire burn that log up She is distant and detached haunted by the ghost of Christmas past But i really really want her time to turn on the defroster, baby Defroster If you really really want her all you need’s a defroster because ice is like rock but water is soft, defroster, baby

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Black Camaro presents Christmas, Carol. Check receipts for download code. Visit PlusCo today. All products 49.99 or less. No returns.

credits

released December 25, 2021

This album
Brian Garth: Guitars, Bass, Synth, Vocals
TG Miller: Guitars, Vocals, Bass, Keys
Scott Trujillo: Drums & Percussion on Shop Till You Drop Bop
James Fuzz Berg: Percussion on People in the Parking Lot and Defroster
Ted Rader: Piano on Row That Big Old Boat Down to Bethlehem

All words and music by Miller & Garth

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